Tom Branch - Roads of Faith

I stand here in life at a crossroads. The path I have been on towards Christ I may not be able to walk that path the same again. I am looking at walking away or another path. The road I was on seems to have been tainted with my high expectations that Christians are human first but live in such a way that shows Christ. That has failed me several times.

The alternate path before me much the same troubles exists as the Christian path. Yet I have more input on this path. It is not my old path; it is a medium between the old and new. It is one where I do for myself and live in such a way that I not put myself out there to be failed or hurt by those who claim the life of Christ.

I do seem to hold Christians higher account than those who are not. Why? Because we should be living for a purpose. Yet we preach the life and not live it. I do not want to endure this unnecessary pain and suffering.

When I needed help with my faith I was given to feel a burden to others.

When I tried to reach out to others, make friends, and understand, to interact with others in the walk…I was given a sense that I was not Christian enough to join them.

I have been forgotten by those he never forgets.

I stand here feeling empty inside. God has not answered me or given me signs or something to go on. My life feels it has no purpose. No direction. Just me wandering nearly aimlessly through life.

I feel more alone as a Christian than I did when I was not living that life. I have run low for years. But then I got more of a refill when I started back at church a year and a half ago. And now I feel as empty before I started.

Right now here I stand at the crossroads where Christ is not sufficient for me. It is good to have a goal up to the heavens yet there are times when we must live here on earth, here and now. And ignoring that is a sin. If we do not know where we are how can we ever get where we are going?

The name of God is taken wrong; at least my heart feels that it is. We judge God too often rather than taking our lives to him.

I still want to help and serve others that are in need. So this is the halfway point from old to new.

Here sitting at the crossroads.

3 Comments:

Lorie said...: "The road I was on seems to have been tainted with my high expectations that Christians are human first but live in such a way that shows Christ. That has failed me several times."

Yep. If you're expectation and hope rested in the performance of the people of God rather than Christ himself, you set out to be let down. Christ doesn't expect his followers to be perfect, yet we arrogantly assume that we have a right to demand that of each other. God never promised that his followers would have perfect relationships or do everything (or even most of anything) right---that's why we are always desperate for Him and his grace. He promised that they would be known by their love---the love they show when they are reaching out, or when they keep coming back for more hard knocks because they know that this is their family because of the Father that unites us.

If Christ is not sufficient for you... Well, he is all there is. By grace he uses us in each others' lives, but only imperfectly and only to point us back to the fact that he is our everything. He is the ONLY one who will never let us down. Hoping in anything else will lead to disillusionment, pain and disappointment.; Wednesday, April 19, 2006 1:55:00 PM
Jason Ramage said...: Actually, I think Tom's right to hold Christians to a higher expectation. It seems like Paul preached constantly about morality, ethics, and living the Gospel. If Christ doesn't change people, then why believe in Him? If Christians's lives aren't about serving and forgiveness, why be a Christian? It's true that we can't live up to the higher standard on our own, but with Christ we can and therefore we are without excuse.; Wednesday, April 19, 2006 11:56:00 PM
Bobby said...: Yeah, but I think you're looking at it from a valid but different perspective than Lorie more so than providing a counter argument. It's all about our own attitude.
On the one hand, as a Christian, I have an example to follow: Jesus. And I have someone who will give me strength to follow that example: Jesus.
But also, as a Christian, I understand about fallenness, brokenness, about "God's not finished with me yet." I understand that "there is none righteous, no not one." I understand that friends will fail me, pastors and elders will fail me, parents and siblings will fail me. And I forgive them. It doesn't mean that I don't hold people to high standards, but it means that I don't demand the perfection in others that resides in Christ alone.; Thursday, April 20, 2006 12:44:00 PM

<< Home