There have been times where I feel like going to help and make a difference somewhere. Now I have that feeling again. I have never been able to do much about it so I hope to get something in the works soon. Yet my biggest fear and concern is am I doing this for myself or for God? Even thought in both I still want to help.

There are two chances for volunteers to help Katrina aftermath. One is locally. I applied for that one today. The other one I am getting information together to see if I will be able to take off for two weeks in order to head down and start helping. But it wont be until the end of the month. It would be great to get away for two weeks and knowing that I am helping when and where it matters I do not seem to be as upset that I would give up nearly all my vacation time at once.

But I want to help. I wished I could get the "hero" thoughts out of my head so that I can more freely serve. Yet this is the hard part of doing so. Is knowing the line between the two. I know that this can be a first step into caring for others and a step away from self. Which would be a great step at this point, yet is that still a selfish desire?

What and how has God called me to serve? I will pray on it some more, yet I know it is really all in his hands.