It's amazing how answers come to you. God works in ways I, well anyone may never know. And for that alone Iam thankful.

Ok tonight I finished up "Growing your Faith" by Jerry Bridges. And near the end it really hit home. Almost as it was speaking to me, in a literal sense.

I am still trying to understand the forgiveness factor and able to move on with issues surrounding my mother. I do not want to get hurt again but I have to let it go, let down my guard, somewhat, and put it back with God. Love and forgiveness.


Matthew 6:15
But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (KJV)

"Give way towards Christ, apporpriate the blood of Christ to cleanse your conscience."

Hebrews 9:14
But Christ was sinless, and he offered himself as an eternal and spiritual sacrifice to God. That's why his blood is much more powerful and makes our consciences clear. Now we can serve the living God and no longer do things that lead to death. (Contemporary English Version)

And on love:
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (New Living Translation)


Through Christ and through Love. That seems to be where the answer lies. I have a feeling tonight will be another heartfelt prayer. Have I forgiven my mother, I don't know. But love requires that I keep no record of wrongdoing. She did me wrong, I feel wronged, and hurt, betrayed...the list goes on. But keeping that mark may not be truley forgiving her.

More to ponder. But am I really going through God, through Christ? Well anyone else wanna raise their hand right about now? We are all in the state called "NO"

I am getting wordy again. Time to shut up and listen. Obviously he is talking to me.